RETREAT

So after getting an IM from an old friend today I realized that I haven’t really been sharing much of what’s going on in my life with any of you guys who read the blog. I mostly assume people are keeping up with me via my Twitters or the TaleChasing site. Granted, even over there I need to update but….you get the idea.

So here’s what all that’s going on.
Things are really good. My relationships are doing very nicely. I’ve been spending some time as a practice bunny for someone working on their hypnosis skills. That’s been very helpful to my stress, urge to interact with others, and getting me out of the house.

Right now, my main focus is on my book and the upcoming Balticon. I promised the release of Guardians the weekend of Balticon, May 22-25. I’ll be on several panels there and I want to pimp the podcast novel while I’m there. So I’m spending a lot of time writing, revising, working with my plot and back story and planning for things like my cover art, giveaway items to advertise it, and all the other things to help with that like an audio promo and a picture promo to be displayed at Balticon. It is a time of stressful creative challenge. But I’m enjoying it.

Chapter one is done and off to the actors to be recorded. I’m working on the sound effects and intro/outro for it and spending time just trying to spread the word. One of the ways I’m doing that is I’ve come up with weekly 1-5 min audio casts answering questions from my listeners about the book.

If you feel like helping please feel free to pimp me to your friends or link my site. I’d love that.
Other then that I’m working out in prep for…yes you guess it…Balticon. Going to yoga and dance classes has been helpful to get me to go as well as to get me to work out longer. My food intake has been relegated to good food only. So no sweets or soda. Fun huh? I’m getting ready to see what happens if you do 200 abs a day for two months. Just as a, ya know, experiment. LOL

Other then that…I’m doing voice over work for extra cash. Playing a few parts in different podcast novels, helping Daddy with work, and just working to be the best me I can.

So there ya have it. That’s what you’ve been missing.

JachelleBell from Twitter wanted to know where I got my inspiration for Jessica, Reagan’s sister.

Remember to send in your questions by leaving comments here on the site, by email or calling 201.830.1586

Guardians, my podcast novel, is on it’s way soon! Right now you can listen to the first Guardians: Angellus Journal that went up Monday! Get your fix by asking any question you want about me, my world, my characters or my voice cast!

Check it out!

Things seem to be going pretty well.

I’m going to visit my parents in March. I’ll be gone from the 9th to the 24th. I am hoping to spend time writing and working with my mom’s dog. Should be fun. I’m also making an appt for my dad to get the same tattoo that I have on my inner arm.

Daddy will be getting another tattoo session on March 10th but since we are showing Christian how to do live video I should be able to watch from Kansas. You can see the video of what we did the other night at http://www.tinyurl.com/cmasot

I just found out today that I will going to Balticon in May. May 22-25th I will be doing a live recording of Tale Chasing as well as a part in the live audio drama being done for Metamor City. I’m very excited about it!

Things are going good with the book. I found a friend who’s been super encouraging, seriously helpful, and just great at helping me stay on track and keep my excitement up. I’ve finished Chapter 1 and it’s out to the actors for recording. I’m working on edits for Chapter 2 and writing Chapter 5. I’ve got several small shorts in the work as teasers. And I have been thinking of some concepts for a trailer video for Guardians.

I’ve been doing voice over auditions and am hoping to get some work from it. I was asked to consider doing interviews for someone which might turn into a paying gig as well, which I’m psyched about.

I’m still swamped with a billion things on my plate and I’m hoping to find some fun stuff to do like maybe an mmorpg to play when I feel happy with all the work I’ve accomplished for a day and want some down times. But we’ll see.

Overall, things seem to be shaping up really well and I’m really happy.

Well I just realized that my goal for January wasn’t made. I intended to have an episode out to you guys for last month. I even know what the episode contains! I just didn’t get it done in time. This post explains a little bit about why that is.

I realize I haven’t written here in a while either. Part of that was because I went back and forth about the issue of “does anyone read the posts”? (hint – feel free to speak up in the comments section if you do so I can get a count)
(more…)

My lovely friend Chris Lester, tagged me in a meme. It’s been forever since I wrote and I think I’m going to keep my new year’s post to TaleChasing. So here are the 16 random things about me.

1) Things I thought about being when I was a kid: Miss America, Singer, Dancer, Author

2)In seventh grade I ate lunch by myself for several weeks and often pretended I was eating lunch with Menudo.

3) I once kicked a boyfriend out of my car because I warned him if he didn’t stop being a dick I would. (I did go back and get him.)

4)The very first roses I ever got were from a boy who stole them from a neighbor. They were pink.

5)The largest number of words I’ve produced on a project is 15,723. I’m close to passing that with Guardians.

6)The first time I met my ex-husband I put on a co-workers name tag so I could decide if I liked him or not before I told him it was me.

7)I collect dragons and lately fairys.

8)I use to try to change traffic lights as if I was psychic.

9)I enjoy wearing a silver band on my thumb. Currently I need a new one.

10)My first voice role was for Chris Lester’s Metamor City as Leena!

11)I once wrote an acceptance speech for my Miss America win.

12)My name was once said on Romper Room (yes it was MY name)

13)I spoke to Santa Clause on the CB when I was little.

14)My CB handle was Little Bo Peep

15)I found my dad’s playboys when I was young and use to go and read them sometimes when I had to do laundry downstairs.

16)I’m an objectivist, and despite myself really liked the story Atlas Shrugged (minus the monologues)

Now to tag others: Soulhuntre, Angela, Lexi, Daddy David, Flagg, Seraphin, MindTweaks, and TheJLDOdornment
IF you do the meme, comment below so that I can come read about you.

In a minute ‘m gonna go lay down cause I’m getting one of those killer headaches and if I can just catch a breath from it I’ll be able to think straighter. But because this is about habits I wanted to get this out before I laid down.

Sometime last year…I decided that I should make the bed anytime someone got up from sleeping. I don’t know if it was Daddy’s preference or it just made the room less messy and I liked it, etc. But I started doing it each time we got out of the bed. Occasionally, while I’m making the bed…I realize I’m doing it because it’s a habit….but for the most part I don’t think about it. I get up, I go to the bathroom, and then I come back and make the bed before I do anything else if I’m up for any length of time. (Weird schedules and all that).

There are many things I have wanted to make a habit of, working out everyday and writing among them. Aside from that there are other “service habits” I need to have that I currently don’t. Sometimes it feels like a long overwhelming list, but I have enrolled the help of Remember the Milk and I’m hoping they will help.

About a month ago, after I recovered enough from my extended sinus and ear infections…I started going to the gym as often as I could. Daddy was going at least 5 times a week and I made it just something I did. If he went to the gym…I went to the gym. It’s not a full blown habit yet but it’s set enough that I felt like crap the other day when I didn’t feel good enough to go. I get up wondering what time we’ll be heading to the gym. If Daddy resets his schedule I panic for a moment wondering how I’m gonna make it to the gym. When I get there…much of the time…I’d so rather not have the pain of working out. But the habit of going to the gym is getting set and I’m happy about that.

Next to add to the list is writing everyday. I have other things I have to set in stone and again I’ll say it…I feel a little overwhelmed…(not zombie after me overwhelmed, Daddy) but overwhelmed none the less.

As a side note…a long time ago I learned to make a habit of expressing my immediate urge to comment back to what people say in my head before I speak it. Usually this works. When I’m in a good mood I don’t slow down enough to do that and I need to learn because sometimes I think I’m in a decent mood and I’m not projecting that. So….add that one to the list.

So here’s a list of a few of the habits I want to get into…so maybe that will help a little:

going to the gym 5-7 times a week
writing daily
working on podcasting at least once a week
entering gyminee info daily
picking up the rooms daily
vacumming weekly
checking the money daily
doing all my health routine daily (including always taking my meds)
choosing good food (more protein daily)
always thinking before i speak
….
there are so many more…i will not get overwhelmed…i will not get overwhelmed….

Hey everyone. I went through another quiet week. Did I mention I need to see if my meds are all on the right level. LOL

Last week I went to see Twilight with @slaveangela. OMG I’m in love. Edward from the movie is….made of WIN! The movie left me wishing I could write like that, I could meet a guy like that, and in this semi state of confidence/sureness/serious state of hormone arousal. LOL I was grinning like I fool the rest of the day, making conversation with complete strangers, giddy, and pretty sure I was the shit who had PLENTY of reason to be picky with my wants and desires. As you can imagine…some of the drug has worn off but I’m sure if I can only loop the movie on my TV 24/7 it’ll all be good. LOL Needless to say I can’t wait for the DVD to come out. I wanted to write a personal thank you to Robert Pattinson who plays Edward but doing some youtube research reveals I’d be lucky to even have one of his managers agency’s interns even see my letter long enough to hit the delete key let alone get him to actually read it.

I may someday write an “open letter to Robert Pattinson” but not right now. All I know is that the performance was amazing. And everyone who enjoys vampires and being seduced by gorgeous guys needs to go see it…NOW and take me with you preferably. It did a lot for helping me understand that if I have an ideal there is nothing wrong with being picky about getting it and that I have plenty of time. It also inspired some thought on my book.

In other news, I started the process of cleaning out our storage unit. Everything must go (pretty much). Tat and Daddy came with me yesterday to help me start sorting and tossing. We made a small dent but there is still so much left to do. I found a few things there were amusing. My Renaissance dress and cape. My self designed prom dress. Some nick nacks I’d packed a long time ago. And I found a great deal of my old printed out writing. Oh and the Barbara Nitke pics she took of me and Daddy. I honestly thought those were lost. I tossed the nick nacks and the clothing. Went and read through the poetry and the writing. I now have a printed copy of the first 6 chapters of the first book I ever attempted. Something COULD be done with it if I ever felt the need to. But I can’t see myself wanting to. I got over historical romance long ago.

Anyway…lots of stuff for me to do. Looking forward to Christmas and my birthday. It’s been suggested we go here for my bday. Looks fun. I’ve added to my amazon list for anyone who wants to buy a present. Though it’s obviously not required.

A while back when I was examining my self-esteem problem one of the books I got was called “The Six Pillars of Self Esteem” by Nathaniel Branden. I picked it up and put it down. I identified with some of the stuff he talked about. Truth is I need to start from the beginning.

Tat started reading it and we’re all gonna finish it. I’ll do that when she’s done with it. But since Daddy took her to the path this morning I was sitting around waiting for him to get back before I fall back into a coma for a bit. I picked up the book from where I left off and the section I am reading is on “living consciously”.

As many of us know…I am the queen of avoidance. I can avoid like no other. Amusing since I also can self anyalise really well to. (btw I”m too tired to worry about my spelling so deal with it ) The section I started reading talks about how in order to live in things that may not be good for us (like drugs, toxic relationships, etc) we must first turn down our ability to “see” by use of other methods like avoidance. In the book’s example…you can later go “i should have known x would happen if I indulged in “pick a bad thing”.” But that at the time you are in those situations if you don’t live consciously it’s easy /not to see/. I do this all the time. It’s something I have to get over.

He recommends sitting down each morning for a few days and writing “If I bring a higher level of consciousness to “x” (my relationship, the way I act when I do x) I see that…” and just write ten things off the top of your head that you realize about that you can /see/ what you are usually attempting to avoid seeing. And that this can help you live life better as well as help your self-esteem. Keep in mind it’s possible to do this exercise and get good results. I did it for a few things in my life and at least 2 of them listed all happy things I would see if I only paid attention.

What I haven’t figured out (and maybe the book will get to it) is what you do when you do see but have a hard time accepting. When you see but you don’t /want/ to see and how you make changes in yourself to live better and to your potential. So…when I find out…if I find out…I’ll let you know.

This has been your daily revelation. You can now go back to whatever you were doing. Thanks for playing.

My fans should know I love to dance. I should go dancing more often but right now I’m not to going by myself. Tonight though I got to go back to a Zumba (latin style aerobics dance class) at the gym. Interestingly enough this was their first night back doing it. I did a whole hour. I had to modify some of it a bit because my muscles weren’t happy with the jumpy parts and I needed to slow down a few times but I think doing an hour of dance routines is awesome.

I was thrilled to find out that the head of the fitness classes was in the room and I got to beg her for more dance like classes. She seemed happy for the advice and here’s to hoping we get more of those. Then I’ll just have to figure out how to get in my 30 mins of weight training on nights I do an hour of dance.

One thing I’m not sure about though is that when I get very into my workout my face turns all red. It happened today during the class and the day before when I did 30 mins of eliptical on lv 3. I looked a little on the net and with my lame google foo skills found one or two things that said it wasn’t bad but nothing that told me why it happens, etc. So if you have good google foo tell me ok!

I took the last two days off to be emotional apparently and I’m hoping in the morning I’ll shake that shit off and get back to writing and being productive. I’m not the queen of avoidance for nothing and while I’m not trying to avoid stuff….placing a little perspective in there might be useful.

Oh and I have one of the cool new avatars on Xbox so you can find me there at (duh) Kimikodreams

Sa’ll for now. Maybe an episode of Angel is in order. (Tabz I really want a part in Angel between the lines next year!)